I strongly believe patience and healing are one of the main components that you need to live a freeing and full life. The world is already congested with so much bitterness and hate, and for what? Surely not for the people who hurt us. It doesn't benefit either side especially yourself. I have been carrying bitterness in my heart for years. I have NEVER EVER stayed bitter for long. I never thought I would ever struggle with this particular thing. I was the person who overlooked any wrong done to me. All that would change in late October of 2016 when a friendship was taken from under me by someone who had come into my life and barely knew.
That was the year I experienced what being in love and pain really was. I cried for a year, my heart throbbed every day as a result of anger, pain, and sadness I felt. It would be almost two years before things took a positive turn and I could finally start on rebuilding the friendship that had once been torn down. Almost two years have passed and my life has done a 360 but, unknowingly, I still had bitterness towards this person. I didn't know just how much until I saw them again. Ironically, I had church that same day. The message was about how how we should not give up on people and how we should forgive what they do. All the while he was saying this. I was listening to God say: "they aren't going to judge you, you need to confess this and let it go." At the point, I started crying hysterically. I kept saying, "I don't know if I will make it to heaven, because I can't......I can't, I've tried and I just can't forgive." At this point, I was releasing my pain through my tears. After hearing other people and their testimonies, I was finally set free.
A couple weeks later, I met a man whose becoming my best friend. He was very clear about his intentions with me from day one. He wants just to be friends and if something eventually develops great and if not, we will just have an amazing friendship and I'm okay with that. He doesn't have a disability but he is going through some physical difficulties that I can definitely relate to. At this point we are helping each other through this crazy thing called life with one joke at a time. He doesn't see me and my disability, he just sees Elia. The same thing could be said about my other two besties and other people in my life. I'm rich in love and second chances.
Like me however, you won't fully experience the abundance of what life has to offer you, until you let go of the past and embrace your present to see a bright future :)
God Bless,
~Elia~
